A recent trip to a store where we were waited upon by a friendly but rather smelly cashier reminded us of something that may seem like it goes without saying, but it needs to be said:
If there is any chance you are going to play, TAKE A SHOWER.
It is standard swinger etiquette to be clean and recently bathed or showered before you play with someone other than your "steady" partner. If you go to a swinger club or house party and think you are going to just watch, maybe even because nobody has ever asked to play with you before, so there is no need to take a shower ... think again. Have you ever heard of the saying "when you stop looking for love is when love finds you"? The same thing sometimes applies here. When you have decided to not have the expectations of having sex when you go to a club and you're just going to go for the atmosphere and have fun, sometimes being that relaxed about it makes the difference between someone passing you over and thinking there is something interesting about you. Just make it a rule or habit that anytime you go someplace where people are having sex, bite the bullet and take a shower. Every time.
What are some other reasons to take a shower? Well, it's polite. Chances are the person you are potentially playing with took one before they came so you could enjoy their bodies all clean and yummy, so you really should return the favor. Also, it increases your chances of playing. Trust us -- if anyone gets a whiff of you being smelly before your clothes come off, they are NOT going to want to find out where the smell is coming from under the clothes. You'll be walked away from pretty quickly. And yes, swingers do talk to other swingers, and people can have reputations. Make clean and yummy-smelling part of your reputation.
Now, the read a book part is something that popped up on our radar online. We haven't read it, but it's a book called The Swinger Manual. If you are serious about learning about swinging, the more perspectives you can get the better. Check it out and you'll probably find lots of material that we haven't covered here. They also have a 17-page preview of the book on the website, so you can get a pretty good idea of if it is interesting before you decide to order it. Have fun!
http://www.swingermanual.com/index.html
There a club440 group on Yahoo groups that you can ask questions on but sadly, it seems no one ever replies. Club 440, like other clubs seem to be very clique-ish. I often wonder if the open-minded would be more open, instead of hiding, swinging, polyamory and "open marriages" would be more accepted someday.
ReplyDeleteThe Swinger Manual is based on the advice and info provided at The Swingers Board - http://www.swingersboard.com
ReplyDeleteAnd yes, showers are highly encouraged!